[20/30] Living Abroad
You know what I miss the most? Just hanging out.
Not a trip. Not some fancy dinner. Just being together. Maybe watching some TV, it could even be just doing our own thing but in the same room.
It’s probably the worst part about moving to another country. You lose that everyday time with family. And it’s really hard to get it back. There’s no “how was your day?”, only “how has work been?” or “have you been well?”
And those are big questions to cover for a call that happens once a month of some times even every quarter. I usually just say, "Work's good" or "not bad, just been busy lately." because I don't know where to start. That random call never feels like the right time to share the "small" stuff. There’s somehow the pressure to only share “big” news.
What’s worse is that, whenever we are together. There’s this unspoken need to do something. To “make the most” of our time. Which often always means traveling.
Which, sure, is run and makes our time together feel more important. We still get to talk and we still get to do things together. But it also means we skip over the quiet, ordinary moments that used to fill our lives.
Some of my best conversations with my family have been from doing errands together. Or just lounging around together. We talk about random things and sometimes that leads to deeper conversations.
I envy people who live near family. Who can just pop by on a Saturday with no plans or itinerary and just hang.
Since I came to Sydney to study and stayed, I’ve don't know what it’s like to be an adult living near family (they’re all back in Malaysia). No weekend drives home. No casual Sunday lunches. And visiting between countries just isn’t the same.
Sometimes I wonder if I can bring back some version of that “how was your day?” moments. I think it means calling more and doing it consistently, not just when we have news to share. I'm hoping that when we have nothing to talk about, we’ll go back to sharing the “boring” stuff more.
I like the idea of a private social feed just for family. A place to share photos, little updates, and snippets of daily life in the moment. Just so they can see the small things too, the ones that often get lost between visits. Almost like mini-vlogs, that might help stitch back some of the everyday. I have been using WhatsApp (that's where we normally chat) for this but there should be a better app for this.